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Tale of an undergraduate. Episode 44

We finally met at a fast food restaurant in town. I’d say a restaurant of her ”choice”. Because she specifically chose it herself. I knew unlike other restaurants, things oVer here were expensive. So, on entering the restaurant door, I said a silent prayer to
the Lord Almighty.
”Lord, please. I just need your help, abeg… Abeg, let Joan ask for only a bottle of water. Pls Answer this prayer o Lord”.
We both sat down, waiting patiently for the person collecting our request to attend to us. I looked at Joans direction and I smiled. She smiled back at me, giving a wink.

The person asking for our request came towards our direction. My heart skipped
twice. She stood at our presence, and asked us for what we wanted.
Waiter: how may I help?
Me: um, what do you have?… Ok…
Um… Do you have LaCasera?
Waiter: yes sir, we have. What else do you want?
Me: how much for the laCasera?
Waiter: it’s 200 naira sir. What else do you want?
Me: wow. 200??… Wow. Ok o. Bring it.
I hope it’s cold o. Because I like cold things.
Waiter: is that all?
Me: babe, what do you care for?
Joan: I’d like Fried Rice and Turkey lap.
On hearing ”Fried Rice and Turkey lap”,

I felt like just failing down and pretending to be dead. It was as if I was dreaming. ”Joan didn’t just say
Fried Rice and Turkey lap. She can’t do this to me.” i began to ponder and cry within me. ”I have a total of 1500 naira.
Well it can cover up this, but how I go take go house?”.
Me: baby, is that all?
Joan: Noo, please do you salad?
Waiter: yes we have.
Joan: don’t bring the one in the small container o. Bring the big one. I love salad. I will take the remaining home. I still have rice and stew at home. (she looked towards my direction and blew me a kiss)
Waiter: what else. Is that all?
Joan: I’d like Hollandia juice. The big one I didn’t know when I obstructed their interaction. I felt like crying. I was broke. I couldn’t take it anymore.
Me: wetin na… (weeping)
Joan: oooh! I’m sorry. Um, just bring a bottle of fanta.
I sat thinking of my next plan of action while we both sat there, waiting for the
waiter to bring the food and drinks. ” na so I go take wash plate. A whole me” I
began to cry within me, ” this can’t be happening”..
Joan: I’m not feeling fine. Doctor say I have malaria.

I could see Joan sticking her hand into her bag and bringing all sorts of drugs out. She probably wanted to show me she was sick but how can a sick person be eaten this much?
Me: sorry babe.
Joan: my boyfriend, says he will send me 20k tomorrow for my upkeep.
Me: ooh okay.
I became confused. ” so this babe get the mind to tell me say, she get boyfriend abi”. I wondered. In no time, the waiter brought a tray with rice and a gigantic Turkey lap. I just shake my bed pitifully. I pitied myself. I began to sip my cold laCasera jejely, while Joan ate her food.
”can you please excuse me” I said.
Standing up from my sit.
To Be Continued.

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Tale of an undergraduate. Episode 43
Tales of an undergraduate. Episode 45

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