Yeah!, I don’t have much experience in talking to girls. How could I? I had attended an all boys government college for my secondary education. And even back in the orphanage home, boys and girls were living separately in two different compounds, the caretakers said it was for the best(e weak me oh). Then again, I’ve never had any real female friend in my life.
Lol, see them. “World people”, I know what you are thinking. Spoilt children, I nor be gay oh. Besides, I’ve had a few female crushes in the past, just like am crushing on this one, currently standing in front of me.
“Really, you love helping people uh, so what if the cameras had caught you”, she said with a fluent English accent(mehn!, be like say this girl na correct Ajebutter and me I be Kpako).
“Jeez, are you serious, I didn’t see any camera in the hall”, I replied with fear in my voice (blood!, it can’t be, although I heard the news about JAMB saying they would install hidden cameras in all exam centres, I didn’t quite believe it).
“Dude am telling you, there was, in fact one was right in front of you, didn’t you see those green petalled flowers scattered around the Ict hall, hidden cameras were inside them”, she continued. Chaii!, my “Village people” don start again. How could I not have noticed? I quickly dismissed my fears though.
“Em, like seriously, I really didn’t notice and besides, I didn’t cheat. I only helped the guy to press “cap lock”, that’s all”, I replied truthfully.
“Well, I understand but you’ll need to be careful next time (which one be next time, I wan write JAMB again), the number of JAMB candidates for this year are really much and the board can and will use any small fault to disqualify some ignoramus few”, she replied with a really concerned tone. Hmmmm, I just dey look the girl.
“Sure, thanks I really appreciate your concern”. “No problem”, she said with that sweet voice (as if sugar dey sef).
I thought she would leave immediately but surprisingly, she remained under the tree shade, standing with me. We stood there in silence for about 5 minutes. It was obvious she was also waiting for someone (probably a friend) because she kept looking at her wristwatch as if she was in haste to leave. All this while, I was just thinking of how to start up a new conversation with her. Gosh!, the silence was so awkward. I know I had to start a conversation but I didn’t know what to say (nawa for me sef oh, how am I supposed to start, lemme think).
“So em, so what school did you put as your first choice”, I asked, stuttering a little(so that was the best start I could think of, what’s wrong with me). “Oh, it’s Imo state university(Imsu), and I applied for computer science, what about you”, she retorted almost immediately as if she has been waiting for me to start a conversation (9ja girls sha, I hail una).
“Wow, Imsu, that’s my dream school and my first choice too, and I applied for Economics, I said smiling brightly, for the first time in as many days. “Nice meeting you, future school mate”, she said stretching her right hand for a handshake. I shook her hand and replied “nice meeting you too”. “By the way, am Ijeoma”, she said. “Nice name you got there, am Ifeanyi”, I was slowly gaining ground.
“Cool, um, are you an indigene of Imo?, she asked me. “Yea, sure, I am and I’d love to go back to my roots. That’s one of the zillions of reasons why I chose Imsu”. “Lol, zillions uh, that’s nice, your own good na, me am from Enugu here but my dad has “connection” in Imsu that’s why am going there”. She revealed.
“Connection uh, this connection of a thing don spoil the country finish. Imagine, even to get one plate of “party rice” at weddings these days, person go need connection for the food department”, I said sarcastically and she burst out laughing uncontrollably(Shuuuuoo, naso the thing funny sef). She managed to cool down after almost 30 secs of bliss.
Chaii!, so this boy u be area too like me, nai you con dey form good English since”, she said and continued laughing. I joined her for a while then stopped. “See this one oh, me and you who first start the forming, I con even tins say you be better Ajebutter, nor be you first start to talk like American person, so I just had to follow your style, I nor wan fall my hand naaa.. “, I said, winking(Gosh!, I’ve suddenly changed from Amateur to pro in talking to girls under 10 minutes).
“Lol, by their face, you shall know them, me I don already know say you be local boy from only your face wey I see so I con even surprise when you con dey speak Oyibo for me”, Ijeoma dissed me again. Mehn!, she’s so outspoken and at the same time meticulous(my dream girl). Our conversation kept on flowing through naturally, we talked about different things(a lot). We strolled side by side to the school’s pavilion and sat down to discuss more. I got to know so much about her, she was 16 and newly graduated from secondary school (based on she wrote Waec recently), eldest child of her family.
The girl is so fun to be with, I don even forget Prosper wey I dey wait for before. Am sure he must be through with his exam by now and must probably think I’ve left already(wetin concern me sef). I’ve found a new bestie in this girl. I just felt like I’ve known her my whole life.
At about 6:30pm, Ijeoma received a phone call from her dad and that brought an end to our ever enjoyable discussion. “Um, it’s my dad, he wants me back home now”. “Oh, so soon?”(I well). “Yeah naa because it’s getting late and e nor good for fine girl like me to dey outside and far from home by this time. I really had a nice evening with you though”, she said in her usual humorous tone.
“Yes that’s true, future school mate, so can I have your em, number”, I asked. “Of course, no problem, after all, we are friends now, 08134428590”. I wrote the number at the back of my E-reg slip. I had told her I left my phone at home (that one na phone before, thank God say I nor carry am come). I promised to give her a call before she boarded a tricycle(keke) home. Thank goodness she was going to the direction opposite mine or else she would have wanted me to commute with her(1 naira nor remain for my body).
As for me, I resumed my trekking journey back home. The Nigeria union of Trekkers(NUT) go soon appoint me as their president. I sabi trek eh. I got home about 20 minutes to 8pm. My dad wasn’t home, by this time on Saturdays, he usually worked night shift at a biscuit producing factory(the man is so hardworking too). I was gonna be home alone till morning. I thought about Prosper, I would have to go see him first thing tomorrow morning (I nor dey go church like that), just to check up on him because the state wey I take see am today for inside exam hall eh, Chaii!, no be here oh.
I proceeded to our small bathroom to take a shower, I was smiling all through (because of someone), plus I haven’t forgotten how I had conquered and slayed my JAMB examination either. If I nor get reach 300 I know say na small thing go commot. Mehn!, I feel like am on top of the world right now.
Wow!, What a day…………….